Impeachment? Forget about it. It will take care of itself.
What we need is an inventor to create Sesame. It may take a genius, but I will give him or her the name of the electronic wand that will open any can or jar with a wave and/or perhaps a touch.
In the past few years, I have spent nearly $100 on devices promoted to open jars, cans, jugs and bottles. None of them work as advertised. I found one that sort of does what it is advertised to do. It opens bottle tops on my V8 juice and iced tea bottles but nothing else. I decided to order another one just like it to keep in another room. It appeared to be the same but it didn’t work.
I have a pile of unworkable openers, including one that is battery-operated that not only doesn’t work but growls an evil warning when I turn it on.
I have an artificial elbow in my left arm. I have three numb fingers on my right hand. I have lived seven and one-half decades. My body is going to wrack and ruin.
We live in an age that solves many of the problems that have terrorized humans for years, if not centuries. And most of the solutions are high tech. For example, who would have thought a few years ago that a diabetic could connect a doodad to his or her arm then wave a wand over it to check sugar in an instant? It is miraculous as are a thousand other things we have to make life easier.
So here’s the deal: The inventor-genius needs to create a wand called Sesame, named after the two-word command “Open Sesame.” He or she will give every producer of every commercial item that needs to be opened the key to having Sesame open their products.
Sesame will be sold to us, the users, for a few dollars. The inventor will make millions and become richer, perhaps, than Amazon’s Jeff Bezos. Why? Because not only do old folks find opening things impossible. I hear the same concerns from youngsters. No one is exempt from this inability to open things. It is as if putting a cap on soups, juices, soft drinks and a thousand other things is an afterthought. It’s clear that these manufacturers are going to make it easier to open stuff without a push from someone who sees a way to force them to think about opening their goods.
Then gone will be the days soda cans explode when you pull a tab on top of the can. Gone will be the days when unscrewing a lid requires more horsepower than it takes to start a car. And gone will be the days when using a can opener requires more power than a human hand or electric motor can possibly muster.
And as an afterthought, the inventor can create a “Silence is Golden” wand that will close Trump’s mouth whenever he starts to tell a lie.